Feeling the Pinch: Finding ways to wed in style, on budget

Using heirloom jewelry and tunes on iPods, today's wedding couples are finding ways to marry in style – but on a budget.

"The wedding industry is in good shape despite economic slowness," says The Wedding Report, a research company based in Tucson, Ariz., that tracks and forecasts weddings and spending.

That is good news for the vendors and bad news for families planning nuptials.

In tight money times, practical families need to decide what is most important – pampering the guests, high fashion clothing or an abundance of flowers – and then compromise on the rest.

An August survey done by The Wedding Report estimated the average wedding, with 100 to 200 guests, costs $28,704 this year, down $18 from last year. But the average cost is expected to go steadily up to $33,552 in the year 2013.

Erin Lippitz-Gelsthorpe, one of the leaders of the Innovation Team at The News-Gazette, put some of her innovation talents to work on her own $5,000 wedding in March.

"We saved so much on our wedding that we were able to treat 50 of our out-of-town guests to breakfast," she said. "The total price tag even includes that breakfast."

In the last year, three News-Gazette colleagues helped each other save money while still having the weddings of their dreams.

– Greta Hale, editor of magazines for The News-Gazette, married Alex Weiderman on Oct. 20, 2007, in Carbondale.

– Lippitz married Tom Gelsthorpe on March 29, 2008, in Urbana.

– Amy F. Reiter, reporter, married Micah Stoutimore on May 3, 2008, in Mahomet.

The ring

Wedding spending starts with the engagement.

"My mother-in-law ... gave my husband three diamond rings of his paternal grandmother's that she had fused together," Lippitz-Gelsthorpe said. "My husband presented me with this three-ring ring when he proposed, and I got to pick out the diamonds I wanted to have put into a setting of our own creation.

"We saved a bundle on the ring this way; plus, I have the honor of having something that belonged to my husband's grandmother. In my eyes, this ring is completely priceless."

Wedding, reception

Wedding site selection dictates baseline costs.

"A big cost savings was picking Carbondale as the site," Weiderman said of her festivities. "His family lives down there, and it's where we met. I'm sure it would have cost more in Champaign-Urbana."

For couples without membership at a religious institution, University Place Christian Church-Disciples of Christ in Champaign invites nonmembers to use its neo-Gothic church for ceremonies.

"They don't have to be a member or use a prescribed ceremony or a particular type of music," the Rev. Terry Ewing said. "I think we've had close to 4,000 people (wedding parties and guests) through here since May."

Couples can use the parlor or courtyard for small weddings with no fee. The sanctuary that seats 450 and has a long center aisle, which appeals to a lot of brides, costs $645 to rent.

Couples who want a formal, indoor wedding but not a religious site might choose the Allerton Conference Center in Monticello.

It costs $5,500 to rent the mansion for six hours, wedding coordinator Cassie Yoder said.

There also are 12 outdoor wedding settings. The popular Sunken Garden rents for three hours at $600.

Area parks also serve as popular outdoor sites for ceremonies. Couples can get married north of Mahomet in the Lake of the Woods park at large for no cost but must let the park staff know about their plans.

Two wedding sites within the Mabery Gelvin Botanical Garden at the park are rented to Champaign County residents for $850 (nonresidents, $1,190).

In case of rain, a $230 pavilion rental saves the day. A pavilion may be rented for the reception – at $590 – when the garden also is rented.

Reiter used the garden and rented a pavilion before the wedding season actually started, but spent nearly $1,000 in rental fees in order to have access to the site for setup the day before and tear down the day after the wedding.

"We bought tiny white Christmas lights after the holiday – $150 of strings for $70 – and hung them from the ceiling rafters," she said. "The centerpieces were candles with a single lily."

The Urbana Park District rents pavilions at Crystal Lake Park for $85 to $110. Alcohol is permitted with extra fees and insurance. The Lake House itself – with a prep kitchen and room with a fireplace – is available for a party of 50 or fewer people with a $75 deposit and $50 per hour.

The dress

"We usually say, 'After you find your venue and date, start your gown shopping for the bride and bridesmaids,'" said Michele Schweighart, owner of Michelle's Bridal in Urbana.

"The best tip I would have for saving money is to work with one shop and get a package with gown purchases and tuxedo rentals," she said. "There are savings and discounts that way."

And check out the sales.

"I'm having a sidewalk sale this weekend (including today)," Schweighart said. "I have one every fall and spring."

Resale shops and classified advertisements sometimes sell used formal wear.

Weiderman ordered her dress in a shorter size, but because she is only 5 feet 1/2 inch tall, it still was too long.

"There was a lot of lace on it, and it would have been expensive to hem," she said. "So I just bought 4-inch platform heels ... and some tall flip flops for when my feet started to hurt."

The men in Reiter's wedding party wore dark suits. Her fiance bought ties all the same color as the bridesmaids' dresses, but in different patterns.

And Reiter did not require the women in the bridal party to match.

"I picked the color – clover – and told them to pick out dresses to suit their own figures and budgets," she said.

The invitations

Paper products – from invitations to programs – also strain the checkbook.

Lippitz-Gelsthorpe had 100 printed at a shop for $75 and folded them in thirds.

"You could rip off the bottom to reply, and I didn't use any envelopes," she said.

Reiter used a low-cost copy shop for her programs and got help folding them from Lippitz-Gelsthorpe and Weiderman.

Weiderman's father, the late Dennis Hale, designed the cover of her programs with pictures of real leaves, a theme for her fall wedding.

The flowers

Next comes flower ordering.

"Picking flowers in season is a big cost savings," said Erin Malloch – a designer who works with Abbott's Florist in Champaign and St. Joseph, and its sister shop, Art Floral Company in Champaign. "Just because you love a tulip, you have to realize that it is not going to work out for an August wedding."

"I try to help brides save money by recommending that the reception centerpieces not be all the same size. You can bring in some candles and spread the flowers around. You can also use the same flowers at the ceremony and at the reception. Get someone in the family to move them."

Lippitz-Gelsthorpe bought five dozen red roses for $15 a dozen plus other floral supplies. Weiderman, Reiter and Stacy Billman, an account executive for the newspaper's magazine group who had some floral experience, made them into bouquets, corsages and boutonnieres a few hours before the wedding.

Spider plants potted by an aunt of the bridegroom decorated reception tables.

The food

Reception food and drink traditionally is the biggest cost of a wedding. Reiter put the emphasis there.

"We had a lot of out-of-town guests, and I wanted excellent food, an open bar and happy people," she said.

Weiderman served casual food.

"We had chicken and barbecue ribs for 130 people at a restaurant in Murphysboro," she said.

Lippitz-Gelsthorpe opted for a family-style meal at a Champaign restaurant where bread, salad, entree and vegetable dishes were passed around for a cost of $21 a plate. She borrowed Reiter's cake cutter and server.

Then she made the wedding cake for Reiter's wedding.

Couples who do not want an expensive cake can actually rent one for pictures. Sweet Indulgence, a Champaign bakery, will rent an artificial cake for $50. Dessert then becomes pieces of grocery store sheet cake, ice cream, homemade cookies or other sweets.

Help from friends

Brides and bridegrooms can ask relatives and friends to provide their professional products or talents as a wedding gift.

"Planning a wedding on a budget is all about using the skills of the people you know," Lippitz-Gelsthorpe said. "We were very lucky to have some very talented and caring friends and family that wanted to help us make our day special."

Tom Gelsthorpe's grandmother made butter mints as favors for guests.

For her favors, Weiderman's cousin made leaf-shaped soap.

Reiter got an uncle in the printing business to provide name-imprinted matchbooks and candles for favors as his wedding gift. A friend made her unique chuppah, a canopy used to shelter the wedding couple in Jewish weddings.

The music

Friends and family also can help shave costs for music.

Lippitz-Gelsthorpe asked a new sister-in-law's boyfriend to play acoustic guitar for the wedding and a cousin to sing.

Weiderman asked her mother, Donna Hale, to play the piano for her ceremony.

Reiter hired a band of mostly high school students to play for her wedding and cocktail hour. For after-dinner dancing, "I paid about $30 for iPod tunes added to the ones I had. And we rented speakers," she said.

The pictures

The most long-lasting mementoes, photographs, are best left to professionals, unless friends have the expertise.

Jon Dessen, owner of Illini Studio in Champaign, has some money-saving ideas:

– Do you really need a photographer for the whole day? Set out disposable digital cameras, which cost about $15 to $20, on reception tables. Later, you can take the cameras to a store and decide which images should be made into prints.

– Most of the time, a package is a better buy. Let's say the average package is $3,000, but if you hire a photographer by the hour and pay him about $200 an hour, or $2,000 for 10 hours, then you still have to buy the photos.

– If you only need a photographer for three hours, ask if you can buy the digital images (generally JPEGs) so you can print as many photos as you want. Some photographers will sell the images; some will not.

As a veteran of so many weddings – 1,616 so far – Dessen says, "I think people like to have very elaborate weddings, but do you really need a limousine, overabundance of flowers, a photographer and videographer and the highest-priced caterers? Many put emphasis on food, drink, the carriage ride and fireworks instead of quaintness. Is the couple there to get married or impress the guests?"

Cost-saving ideas for weddings

Cele Otnes, a marketing professor at the University of Illinois who co-authored a 2003 book on the allure of the lavish wedding, gives tips for saving money on weddings:

— Couples who plan destination weddings to faraway locations end up entertaining fewer guests and already are at their honeymoon site.

— Weddings are moving from the most popular month of June to September and October to avoid peak-season costs for both services and the trip.

— Afternoon weddings eliminate sit-down dinners.

— Rehearsal dinners are at home or in casual restaurants; and couples make their own table centerpieces.

Other ideas culled from recent brides and professional wedding organizers:

— Pick a small town that means something to the couple, then stage events there.

— Consider an outdoor setting such as a park that has no to low rental costs; rent a tent in case of bad weather.

— Make reception decorations yourself; buy things like lights offseason; check newspaper classified ads for previously used items.

— Wear a relative's bridal gown, altered to fit; let bridesmaids pick their own dresses within a color scheme; tell the men to wear their own suits and provide special ties.

— Visit copy shops for suggestions on low-cost invitations and programs.

— Buy flowers in bulk and ask family or friends with some expertise to assemble them; reuse church flowers at the reception.

— Think casual food that everyone likes, such as pizza or barbecue.

— Forgo an elaborate wedding cake and serve sheet cake, ice cream or candy for dessert.

— Use accessories such as cake servers and toasting glasses borrowed from family or friends.

— Ask talented family and friends to play instruments and/or sing; hire student musicians; program your iPod with favorite tunes, then use the reception site's sound system or rented speakers to broadcast the music.

— Provide disposable cameras at the reception for guests, and send the professional photographer home; ask pros if they will sell images of your event on a disc so you can print your own.

Also on this date

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• Residents throwing support behind sites slated for closure
• Governor's budget cuts reach beyond closure of state parks
• Group hopes to help comfort injured soldiers' loved ones
• Feds probing complaint at Champaign County Nursing Home
• Early reviews of efforts to improve Garden Hills all positive
• Obituaries

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